*sigh*

sorry guys..its enuff for me for now...there will be no update no what so ever..for i donno a week, two weeks or maybe a month..or i might just abandon this virtualy stash of memories here..just like that..i found myself guilty..i found my self in pain..but this the only possible way for me to keep my saint..im sorry if i did not talk to people that much..i have hell problem to solve..and i hope u guys respect me of doing so..

back off does not mean i give up or stuff like that..if this help other peoples..if this would make others feel better..why dont do it rite?..falling back and hurt now is a better choice than took it a little further more..this is the only way that i could think of..i started to think that whatever i heard from her...are all just merely fake..just a make up feeling to make me feel ok..at the same time i trusted what she meant by her words..and i guess..i should say sorry to u..tompang bahagia at u for quite long time..im so so sorry..

The reason i want to spit out this jarred thoughts...
..is because there's no other proof for existence
My future, which i thought i cought..
..is conflicted between "dignity" and "freedom"

The reason why i want to erase this distorted after-images..
..is because i see my limits on them
By my window of over self-consciousness..
..hangs last year's calendar with no dates on it

so ill..erase it..and rewrite

if only i could just fade away...goodbye